In the prosperous village of Little Hillbillytown, Rose Cotton, aged 18, and 14-year-old Sam Gamgee, sweethearts, are graduating from Lantern Academy. The school's dean, Headmistress Uptight, can be seen scolding Sam about not lighting his kerosene lantern when she told him to, a tradition at the school.
The camera pans in on a calender, showing May 29, 1917. A gust of wind blows the pages, which flip in a fast blur before finally stopping on July 31, 3000.
We see the same town as before, only now it has become dilapatated and poverty-stricken, with the only building rising above the rubble a Victorian mansion. On the flat wooden roof, Rose and Sam are lounging in patio furniture, basking in the summer warmth.
Down in the dingy streets below, a small boy runs at the mansion, and hovers up into the air, apparently ready to attack Rose.
Rose calmly pulls a horn from her belt and blows it, causing the boy to fall onto the road below.
"You know I hate it when you weirdoes use your magic powers." Rose calls down to him, putting emphasis on the word weirdoes.
"Your a witch, too!" yells the boy, "You have magic! That's how you've been mayor for almost two-thousand years!"
"How dare you!?" she yells angrily, "All of you! I hate you all wizards!"
"Er, Rose?" nudges Sam nervously.
"What!?" she screams.
"Look." He points at a small dot growing closer on the horizon, flying toward the town.
"What the--?" she squints up at the bright sky.
The figure turns out to be an alien.
"Go away, you!" yells Rose.
"Excuse me, ma'am," says the alien politely, "My name is Slash Glorgson, do you know where Rose Cotton lives?"
"I'm Rose Cotton." she sneers, "What's it to you?"
"I'm your son." he says emotionally.
Rose snorts. "I have no son."
"Of course you do!" he says, "I'm Glorg Glorgson's son! Remember him?"
Rose's face turns dark, "I will never forget. He was an alien, a freak like you are. He and that darn brother of his abducted me in their spaceship and raped me in 1903."
"That was my dad." says Sam.
Slash turns to Sam, "Your dad? You're my brother?" Confused, he turns to Rose, "Explain."
Rose begins a story, which is seen in flashback form as she tells it. "In 1903, when I was just a girl, four years old, I stepped through a time warp which turned me into an eighteen-year-old. I was abducted and raped by two aliens called Glorg and Flarg, brothers, and they raped me. Glorg got pregnant--"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" interrupts Sam, "Glorg got pregnant?"
"Alien anatomy is different. Aliens have no specific gender." says Slash, and tells Rose "Continue."
"Glorg put me back on earth and gave birth to twins. Slash and Sam. Sam didn't turn out an alien and Glorg put him on earth in shame, and he was adopted by the Gamgee family. Slash remained in space with his father and uncle.
"In 1917, fresh out of college, I married Sam, not knowing he was my son, and we had a child. He was born a giant, which I found strange, and we had a test done and it turned out Sam was my son, but we were in love, and stayed together."
"You have another son than me and Sam?" asks Slash.
"Technically he's my son and grandson. And you, Slash, are no son of mine. I hate wizards and aliens. Weirdoes."
"Where's this other kid?" Slash inquires.
"James!" calls Rose, and a giant man in a business suit walks in, and Rose hovers up to his head and kisses him.
"You're a witch!" exclaims Slash, seeing how she flew up.
"No! I'm not!" she says hurriedly, landing, "You're a freak!"
In anger, Slash punches James in the chest, sending him into a coma.
"You ARE A WITCH!" he bellows.
"NO I AM NOT!" she yells back, and he pushes her off the roof. Moments before she hits the ground, she flys back up.
"Ha!" he yells, "You are magic! You are my mom!"
Suddenly she blows her horn, and he falls from the sky, causing him to bust his head on the ground, and be knocked unconcious.
When he comes to, Rose is hunched over him. "Leave this town. Never return." she says through clenched teeth.
Crying, Slash runs off, but instead of leaving the town stays with a group of wizards in exile, living in a broken down factory/drug house.
The pilot episode is the lowest-rated episode of the series, with critic Mitchell Riffe saying "Episode one hardly qualifies for a comedy, it is dull and blunt." However, some appreciated it as one of the more emotional episodes. Says George Thompson, "It was a good introuction to the series, even though not funny, it gave us a peek into the relationships between the characters."